Hyperclownism
This entry's text is incomplete. Please complete it; then you can go outside to play.
Hyperclownism is a genetic abnormality causing various mental and physical problems in sufferers. People stricken with hyperclownism, frequently referred to by the pejorative "clowns" have been forced throughout history to perform as side show attractions and entertainers, due to their unusual appearances and strange behaviors. The term "clown" is considered a slur within the hyperclownic community, but is still widely used in common discourse.
Genetic Cause
Hyperclownism is a genetic medical disorder caused by an error in the fourth gene of chromosome 13. This gene codes for proteins connected to proper brain development (specifically decision-making centers of the brain), skin pigmentation, hair color, nose size, color recognition, and sense of touch. The error causes the proteins to fold incorrectly upon formation. The regular protein folding configurations are replaced by folding shapes resembling animals, such as horses, giraffes, and dinosaurs. These are referred to as "balloon animal" protein folds.
Physical Traits
Those suffering from hyperclownism are generally stricken with total facial albinism highlighted with unusually bright colored pigmentation defects around the mouth. They exhibit hyperclownic hair (brightly colored hair which is unusually fine and thin). Many but not all people with hyperclownism have large, red, bulbous noses.
Mental Abnormalities
Hyperclownic individuals frequently exhibit poor decision making skills. They are frequently observe to be carrying too many objects in their arms, leading to accidental dropping of the objects. They tend to walk with an unusual gait with many odd and unnecessary movements. The hyperclownic also tend to appear to be making awkward or silly faces. However, these are due to involuntary facial movements.
Abnormalities of the Sensory Nervous System
Hyperclownic individuals have extreme sensitivity of the skin to touch. Even the touch of a course fabric causes intense pain. Thus, many hyperclownic individuals tend to wear loose fitting clothing. As they are also frequently color blind, these clothes also tend to be brightly colored, which allows them to more easily select an appropriate wardrobe.
Chronic Mimery
Approximately 10% of hyperclownic individuals also suffer from the concomitant genetic condition, chronic mimery. In addition to the abnormalities suffered by the hyperclownic, the chronically mime lack the ability to speak. Furthermore, due to an additional disorder of the nervous system, the chronically mime frequently suffer from hallucinations in which they perceive physical barriers in front of them which are not there. It is not uncommon to find a chronic mime trying to escape from an invisible box. As such, chronic mimes generally wear special prescription white gloves when out in public to help them discern hallucinated barriers from real ones.
Historical Discrimination and Forced Performance
Because of their unusual appearances and behaviors, hyperclownic individuals have been objects of ridicule and forced performance for centuries. As it is an inherited disorder, it was not unusual at one time to see entire hyperclownic families performing in traveling carnivals and circuses. Until the 1980's, many sufferers of chronic mimery were kidnapped and forced to stand on street corners, with their prescription gloves replaced with normal white gloves. These "street mimes" would spend their days trying to escape from invisible boxes, with their handlers seizing any donations from passers-by, who mistook the chronic mimes for ordinary street performers. Today, many of the hyperclownic still perform voluntarily either out of tradition or due to lack of better job opportunities.
Contemporary Automotive Discrimination
In most facets of life, hyperclownic individuals no longer experience the systemic discrimination and ridicule of times past. However, because of their perceived reduced mental capacity and poor decision-making abilities, hyperclownic individuals are restricted to driving only the smallest compact cars. Since the job opportunities available to hyperclownic individuals are generally not well-paid, it is not uncommon to see upwards of ten to twelve hyperclownic individuals riding in one compact car.